© 2014 by Joyce Mason
All Rights Reserved
In Celebration of Independence Day in the USA
Gestalt Prayer
© Frederick (Fritz) Perls
I do my thing and you do your thing.
I am not in this world to
live up to your expectations,
and you are not in this world to
live up to mine.
You are you,
and I am I;
and if by chance
we find each other,
it's beautiful.
A really savvy mom
I knew many years ago once told me, “I realized when my sons were just babies
that I was training them, bit by bit, to leave home.” Never mind that she was a
Sagittarius and would be more keenly aware of the joys of leaving the nest.
This is still a remarkable realization for someone not far from the glow of
early motherhood.
As we celebrate the 238th birthday of the United States of
America on a holiday called Independence Day, I thought it would be interesting
to look at the quality of independence—so revered by Americans—how we find it
in an astrology chart and to consider its importance to us as individuals. But
before we jump in, I think Americans have to remember that our values about individuality
and independence are not globally accepted as a good thing. It’s really
enlightening to see ourselves from others’ points of view. That’s why my
husband likes watching news from the BBC or any country other than our own.
The vast majority of Radical Virgo readers are American, but
let’s start with the one way others see us that we share. In An
Adventure in American Culture and Values, an international student guide to
the USA, individuality is at the top
of a list of major US American values. Single-family, individual, separate
homes are one way this is expressed even in our urban planning. We are rewarded
as kids for being goal-oriented and not too clingy to family. “Going away to
college” has long been considered the norm and ideal for making the first big break
from mom’s apron strings.
Like all continuums in life, the one that starts with
Dependence and ends with Independence is a pathway we traverse, back and forth,
through our entire existence on Planet Earth. We have to find where we fit
between its two extremes. And, of course, where we reside on the road between
Commune and Single Family Dwelling may vary during our lives. Our natal
astrology charts will reflect our basic independence orientation. Aquarians
might be happy living in an individual pod on the Planet Far Out, as long as
everybody got together for group fun and games now ‘n’ then. The most typical
Cancer might be happy never to leave home in the first place.
Let’s look at the signs, planets and houses most associated
with “being independent.” Look at your own chart to determine your personal
emphasis. The idea of this exercise is to see the level of independence your
birth chart calls for—and to find out if you’re answering the call. Does your
life match your birth chart’s wiring on this issue?
“In my humble opinion” rules what follows, and I’d be happy
to hear your ideas in the Comment. (For another view, here’s a Top 5 Most Independent
Signs list.)
Independent Signs
Aries. It’s the opposite of Libra, the relationship
sign. We joke about Aries being “me first” and literally being first whenever
possible. Pioneers and trailblazers tend to travel alone—or at least at the
front of the pack, far from the others left in the Ram’s wake of charging
forward.
Virgo. Virgos are known for being
self-contained. See The Radical Virgo,
the article after which this blog is named. In the sign of Virgo, an individual
learns self-reliance and the inner wholeness that can lead to having his or her
whole self to give in the next sign, Libra.
Scorpio. Scorps can “go either way” when it comes to
the issue of independence. They are
often fine with long periods of isolation, and when they partner, they tend to
focus (obsess?) on one partner deeply. Their quiet introspection, and on the
darker side, their sometimes brooding nature does not court frivolous
attachment. Not only do they often go it alone for extended periods; they very
selective in the company they keep—in some ways, even outdoing Virgos.
(Would-be suitors, be prepared to fill out an invisible application form.)
Sagittarius. You’d
think with all the travel, talking and philosophizing that they do, Sagges
would be the poster people for interaction. They are but their mantra is,
“Don’t fence me in.” I know one Sag who took over 20 years to say yes (finally)
to her fiancé’s proposal. (Talk about a patient man.) This individual requires
a lot of freedom in relationship, as do all the “independent” signs.
When a person is in relationship because they want to be instead of because they think they should be; when he or she finally says yes to a long-term commitment, it’s momentous.
Aquarius. Often
cited as the archetypal independent sign, Aquarius is often too busy with
issues of society to get too close to individuals. Not to mention, with Uranus
as its ruler, Aquarius is about as predictable and constant in relationships as
lightning in a summer storm. Changeability is deeply woven into the Aquarian
nature, and like Sag, Aquarius does not like fences or “shoulds.” On the other
hand, when Aquarius—or any of the more independent signs—is there because they
want to be and aren’t pressured to commit until they’re ready, they can
ultimately thrive in relationship and learn to relish interdependence.
"Independent” Planets
While each of the “independent signs” has a ruling planet,
there are other planets that get into the act when they have a lot of emphasis
in a chart. If you have a lot of aspects to any of these planets, it increases
your I.Q. (Independence Quotient).
Sun. “I gotta be me” is the Sun’s tagline, and
taken to an extreme, very Solar people can be self-centered. A Solar emphasis can
keep a native isolated at the hub of his/her personal solar system, to the
point of not needing anyone’s help or input, thank you. In this case, the
Sun-emphasized chart can speak to a need for a lot of independence—and perhaps
being “too independent.”
Mercury. Mercury is one of those “can go either way”
planets when it comes to independence. Mercurial people think a lot, which is a
solo activity—but they love to communicate, which takes others. However, there
can also be a danger with many aspects to Mercury of talking more than connecting,
a potential distancing strategy.
Jupiter. The
grand gestures of the Jupiterian person can be as distancing in a certain way
as the verbosity of an overly Mercurial type. Gifts and huge kindnesses often
leave the recipient feeling beholden to the giver, even if that is not the
conscious intent of the Jupiter person. This creates a certain distance and
discomfort. (How will I ever repay him or her? What is really expected of me?)
Always being the giver leaves a person in a psychologically superior position.
They don’t have to have the humility of thanking someone kindly nor the
possible appearance of needing help. They can view themselves as strong and
never needy. If you’ve got lots of Jupiter or even a good Jupiter trine going
like I have, look at how your generosity can be a sign of over-independence,
especially if you rarely allow yourself to receive.
Chiron. Since Chiron is my area of expertise, I
thought I should comment that the same thing can go for always being the teacher/healer
as it is for Sagittarians who are always the giver. After all, Chiron and Sag
are both centaurs! (Some say the same centaur, but that’s another
conversation.) If you have a lot of Chiron aspects, look to see if you are
using your healing and counseling skills to create I/Thou distances between
yourself and others. Do you really enjoy being the centaur, healer or teacher
on the mountain—or would you prefer to be more down to earth in peer
relationships where sharing each other’s gifts occurs in a more egalitarian
flow? Food for thought …
Uranus. As the ruler of Aquarius, of course numerous
aspects to Uranus will impact your Indy Quotient. It’s hard to find fellow
unicorns so far out on the leading edge, and this loneliness tends to be a
life-long challenge. It’s not that Uranians don’t want friends; they love
friends. However, finding friends that really understand them can be quite a
quest.
It’s not surprising that the entire Independence/ Dependence conundrum is contained within the essence of Uranus and the sign it rules, Aquarius. Uniqueness is the ultimate form of independence. When we regard independence highly, we have to find our way to allow others to do their own thing while we do ours. Solving this interpersonal puzzle is why The Gestalt Prayer was so popular in the 1970s when Pluto was conjunct Uranus and our relationship to both of these powers was being transfigured.
Pluto. Which, speaking of, brings us, finally,
to Pluto. If you’re like me, one of the astrologer/astrology students who is
still laughing over the “demotion” of Pluto from the status of planet to dwarf
planet, you’re laughing not to cry over the irony. Like all the outer planets,
Pluto is potent—and if I had to name only one that’s the most powerful in its
effects, I’d have to say Pluto. Pluto is the power you will not win against.
Pluto is about joining your small will to the bigger will—some would say God’s Will
or Universal Will.
Unfortunately, we experience Pluto most in its negative
archetype. We have plenty of cultural icons to fill the role. There’s Darth
Vader in Star Wars. In Harry Potter, it’s He Who Must Not Be
Named (but I’m Uranian, so I’ll say it—Voldemort—ducking lightning). On The Sopranos, it was Tony Soprano. They
may have had their minions over whom they had power, but did any of these guys
have any true, close friends?
Power may be the ultimate aphrodisiac, but in the end
there’s no one to do it with but yourself. That is when power is one-way. The
ultimate Plutonian lesson is to harness The Force and the power of good—and to
help everyone find that power within themselves.
If you are very Plutonian, how are you harnessing your
power? Does your power frighten? Put off? Plutonian independence can come more
from isolation due to the difficulty others have being in your energy field
without a lead vest. (A Plutonian who transmits fierce energy probably has not
yet come to terms with his or her own issues of power abuse, usually as a
victim.) This chart emphasis calls for the ultimate inner work to find your
rightful place on the Dependence-Independence gamut. That involves finding your
own positive power and empowering others to live in their own light. When those
lights blend the fireworks are amazing—the kind we’d ooh and aah over any 4th
of July. Some positive Plutonian empowerment figures are Nelson Mandela, Maya
Angelou, Oprah Winfrey and a host of other celebrities
who have overcome power abuse of various kinds.
On Independent
Houses
When working with the astrological alphabet of planets in
signs and houses to make sense and sentences out of horoscopes, I think the
houses are generally neutral on the Dependence/Independence scale with a few of
exceptions. A very emphasized 1st house can indicate strong need for
independence, just as a strongly emphasized 4th or 7th
can mean a strong need for relatedness. Some houses can lend themselves to
independence by over-emphasis not in and of themselves—but by how you live in
them. For instances, if you’re obsessed with money and have a crowded 2nd,
you may shut out relatedness for the pursuit of wealth. Same thing with workaholism
in the 6th house of work or the 10th of career. On the
other hand, if you’re wired for relationship, you could be a team player and do
the activities of these houses with others. However, the four angles and their
house pairs do have Dependence and Independence built into their oppositions—1st/7th
and 4th/10th.
Putting it All
Together
If you look at your chart through the lens of your Indy
Quotient, the next question is whether the way you’re living your life fits
with your dependence or independence needs. Sometimes life just isn’t working,
a general malaise you can’t quite name. The “cure” can be something as simple
as realizing the mismatch between your life as it is now and your actual needs.
Even if you only learn from this review of your own
independence factors that you’re living your dream—and isn’t “the American
Dream” what we celebrate every 4th of July?—it’s worthy of waving a
few sparklers for the wonderful freedoms we have to live our lives in the main
however we want. To live in a country where we can decide how independent to
be—or not to be—is a gift as precious as life itself.
And, of course, the chart of our country also reflects the
puzzle of the Dependence to Independence continuum—Venus, Jupiter, Sun and Mercury in Cancer,
Aquarius Moon and Sag Rising.[1]
Happy Independence Day—and Happy Independence Day every day,
as much of it as you want or need.
~~~
Photo Credits: US
Flag and Fireworks © romantiche - Fotolia.com; Alone on Own Planet ©
prihodkosvetlana - Fotolia.com
NOTE
[1]
The Sagittarius Rising or “Sibley” chart
of the USA is the most popular among astrologers, but it’s not by any means the
only one advocated. Search “astrology charts USA” to learn about some of the
interesting alternatives.
2 comments:
Happy Independence Day, Joyce.
I read your post yesterday and meditated a bit the day through, while my Moon took its monthly trip through my 12th house, visiting my Pluto and Uranus who reside so deeply hidden on its way.
I had a dream about a year ago, where I left my apartment and walked a very hard asphalted way and ended in a wonderful new home where everything was furnished with brown velvet, even the walls.
It seemes now clear that I had changed my life and now the walk remained to the place where having changed my life I could now live my change.
My achilles heel (or one of them) with Neptune in my 2nd house is my very nebulous relation to material values, and I have while walking that asphalted road had to ask for financial help not once but so many times, without any hope or possiblity that I would be able to pay back, like I would do myself.
Every time has been confronting a moster of fear that I might risk a no, which also has happened (but only once) when the request would not seem appropriate or it was a thing that they would not or could not givt.
But otherwise I have been so generously supported by my inner circle and also like Blanche depended on the kindness of strangers.
This past month I have also been confronted with so many friends and significant (perhaps) one time encounters with suffering people who claimed they cherish their independency more than anything.
And the remaining question is of course to what purpose do I use our so difficultly achieved independence.
It surely cannot be an aim in itself but a means to with I am able to give myself freely without the codependency that I often earlier experienced as part of the package.
Forcing myself to trust that I be helped and allowing myself to be dependent has to me been the real way to live my change and be truly independent. Strange and wonderful.
Mads, you are so right on about how too much independence is not necessarily a good thing. Thanks for sharing your experience from the laboratory of your life. I am still learning my right relationship with this wonderful quality that works best in just the right amount. I think it's a bit harder for us in the US, as this value is touted right up there with Mom and apple pie--another metaphor for our Cancer/Sag/Aquarian chart and our struggle with the Big I. Bless you for your personal (and European) perspective!
Maybe we need to have an Interdependence Day, which seems to me to be the happy medium.
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